I found this book to be fascinating, and I enjoyed reading the book. I’ll tag this book as a typical Nigerian book because the story reflects what goes on in a Nigerian home.
The Secret Lives of Baba Segi’s Wives is set in Ibadan, Nigeria, and tells the story of a man named Ishola Alao, who’s popularly referred to as “Baba Segi.” Baba Segi is a wealthy man who loves women a lot, evidenced in his marriage to his four wives: Iya Segi (the first wife), Iya Tope (the second wife), Iya Femi (the third wife) and Bolanle (the fourth wife), along with their seven children. Baba Segi loves his wives and children dearly and is always keen on creating family bonding time, which I admire.
One thing I find strange and slightly amusing about Baba Segi is how he responds to news. Whenever he is told anything, he suddenly feels pressed and goes to the toilet to unleash, and when he comes out, he acts like nothing has been said to him.
The story of Baba Segi and his wives took me through a roller coaster of emotions. I cried and felt anger and pity in turn for some of the characters in the book. Despite how Baba Segi loved his wives and children equally, there was no love amongst his wives. They each strived to be the best wife for Baba Segi and competed with one another.
Iya Segi, Iya Tope, and Iya Femi had no formal education, which affected their way of life and thinking. The fourth wife, Bolanle, was the only wife that had a formal education. She was a graduate, earning her extra admiration from Baba Segi, which made the other wives jealous.
Baba Segi’s wives all led secret lives, and I loved how the author systematically wrote about it, which made me understand the story better and even enjoy it more.
There are lessons one can pick out from this story. We primarily learn about the problems that go on in polygamous homes. When Baba Segi brought Bolanle home, the other wives weren’t happy, which sparked jealousy and hatred. Iya Segi and Iya Femi disliked Bolanle so much that they decided to poison her. Ultimately, their evil plan backfired, costing the life of Baba Segi’s first child – Segi. Iya Tope tried to be nice to Bolanle, but the other two were against Iya Tope’s decision. In all, Baba Segi’s home seemed quite messed up, which was quite sad.
Another issue from this story is the issue of rape. Nobody deserves to be raped. It is a traumatizing experience. Bolanle, who used to be a bubbly and happy child, became a shadow of herself after she got raped at a young age. I felt so bad for all that Bolanle passed through as a young girl. Her mother didn’t play the motherly role she should have, which subsequently affected Bolanle and her sister’s life. Bolanle’s mum wanted her to be the perfect daughter, the “star” child and chastised her whenever she didn’t meet her expectations. Her mother’s demands for perfection negatively affected Bolanle after she got raped. After Bolanle got raped, she lost herself, but at the end of the day, she was able to find herself back and sail through all the terrible hurdles she passed through.
Parents should endeavor not to be so hard on their children and desist from demanding perfection always.
I love this book so much. So many lessons one can pick out from this book. I highly recommend this book.
