The Middle Daughter by Chika Unigwe

In The Middle Daughter, we learn that there is fragility and compassion in dealing with people who are consumed by grief, especially the ones who do not know how to carry on life.

So many thoughts race through my mind about this book; where should I even begin? Still, I must start from some, as, as they say, even the longest tuber of yam must be chopped.

Synopsis

The Middle Daughter delves into the lives of a tight-knit family – a father, mother, and three daughters, Udodi, Nani, and Ugo.

Their once-happy existence cracks when Udodi dies and finally shatters when they lose their father to cancer. As the title suggests, the story is centered on the life of the middle daughter, Nani.

Themes

Grief and Christianity stand out as central themes, each explored in depth.

Grief

Grief, as the book reveals, is a deeply personal journey with no set path for healing.

Although some people are passive in the way that they grieve, it doesn’t mean that they love the person any less. Others are consumed by it for a very long time, slowly moving on, with the shock of the removal staying with them.

In The Middle Daughter, we learn that there is fragility and compassion in dealing with people who are consumed by grief, especially the ones who do not know how to carry on life. You hold them kindly and lovingly, you listen to them, and you stay with them even in silence.

What you do not do is insist that they get over it.

The major turning point in the book starts with how Ugo and their mother treat Nani’s grief. It made her withdraw, and that withdrawal was the beginning of everything wrong in the book.

Christianity

In The Middle Daughter, Christianity is depicted as a tool for manipulation, with characters like Ephraim twisting religious teachings for their own personal and selfish gain.

Ephraim’s actions evoked a certain kind of anger in me as fury lay in my chest days after reading this book. Ephraim’s character is a representation of most Christian pastors or leaders out there who use the teachings of the Bible to manipulate people to their advantage.

Love

And there was Nani’s mother. Love is such a difficult thing to believe, especially when your actions are in contrast to it. It was hard for me to believe that love lay in her heart, especially after experiencing that kind of grief.

It made me miss Doda; it made me miss his quietness, the way he held his children, the way he would have held Nani and made it easy for her to open up, to come to him. It was a life she was sure of; she didn’t have to double-guess when Doda said he loved her. He was a friend to his daughters and Nani because when Doda died, something in Nani died along with him.

Socio-Cultural Debates

The book also tackles the issue of rape apology, shedding light on societal attitudes that blame the victim rather than holding perpetrators accountable.

Nani’s fear of being blamed resonates with many other girls who have faced similar traumas, highlighting the injustice and added torment survivors endure.

Final Thoughts

The Middle Daughter is a captivating read that will keep you engrossed from start to finish. It would cause you to question a mother’s love, to question the extent to which a person can be resigned to life, and the extent of manipulation.

I definitely recommend this book!